Loose Ends
by Lovepeaceandwar
Summary: "Sequel to Fate and Destiny" Sam is back in Seattle after two years at a boarding school in London. What has changed in her absence? The friendship between the iCarly trio has fallen apart. What about romance? Can relationships be mended? Takes place in their senior year. Nothing is as it appears to be. Disclaimer: I don't own iCarly or any films/music mentioned in this story.
1. New Beginning

Got me looking so crazy right now, your love's  
>Got me looking so crazy right now (in love)<br>Got me looking so crazy right now, your touch  
>Got me looking so crazy right now (your touch)<br>Got me hoping you'll page me right now, your kiss  
>Got me hoping you'll save me right now<br>Looking so crazy in love's,  
>Got me looking, got me looking so crazy in love.<br>Beyonce - Crazy in Love

Sam POV:

Freddie Benson. Why they hell is he looking at me like that? Is it that much of a shock that I'm here? It's not like I said we would never see each other again. I knew this day was coming. I've known since my old school burnt down. I'm only here to graduate and tie up some loose ends. After that, I am gone. I have no reason to stay. Why would he choose to sit in front of me?  
>My next class will obviously be my favorite. I have Musical theater with Ms. Darbus with Tasha and Wendy. They aren't necessarily musically gifted but they have a knack for drama. All three of us walk to class together in the auditorium. I see a familiar brunette that I used to call my best friend. I don't hang out with bitches anymore. When she saw me, her eyes nearly popped out of her head. It was like she had seen a ghost. Well guess what? I'm back from the dead. After I take my seat with my friends, The tech nerd walks in. What is he doing here? It's not like he is a performer. They must need some tech guy to do stage work. Benson is staring again. Have his biceps gotten bigger?<br>"Hello class," Ms. Darbus interrupts my thoughts. "Welcome to musical theater." Some of my classmates groan. They clearly are not as enthusiastic as I am. "We will work together for the production of the winter school musical. We have four months to prepare. Students that are not in the club are able to participate and audition. We will also go over other past musicals for the curriculum."  
>"What musical will we be performing?" Carly asks eagerly. Oh right she was used to being the star.<br>"Miss..." Ms. Darbus drifts off.  
>"Shay, Carly Shay" she answers with too much perkiness. I'd hit her if I hadn't gone through anger management.<br>"Well Miss Shay, we will be performing the hit musical Chicago. I already have an idea who will star," she winks at me. Some students notice and look in my directions. I do my best to avoid eye contact. "Samantha Puckett come to the stage." I inwardly wince at my full name. I follow her directions and respond.  
>"Please call me Sam, Ms. Darbus," I said as I approached the piano and adjust the microphone.<br>"Very well. Tell the class about yourself. I heard you used to live here.  
>"I transferred from Ridgeway to a boarding school two years ago. I'm a performer. I like to make people laugh or cry or smile. Ultimately, I like stimulating emotion from an audience. Whether it's performing musically or acting, I enjoy being in front of people. I'm usually not so fond of attention."<br>"When did you first start performing?"she asks.  
>"I did pageants back when I was eight years old. I'm a natural dancer. Tap is my speciality. I did some acting on my old web show. I didn't start performing musically until 2 years ago for my audition piece for the boarding school," I answer seeing the shock on people's faces. I feel it has more to do with my polite and somewhat obedient nature. I wasn't that obnoxious and rude. Was I?<br>"If you are wondering why Sam is sharing this information, I am happy to tell you. At Rose School for Girls in London. Sam studied performing arts and was the lead in six of the school's musical productions. This program is one of the best in the world. What are your plans for the future, Sam?"  
>"I'll study Drama at a top university and minor in music or something like that. Washington State University has a great Musical theater program. I'd go there as a back up."<br>"WSU's Musical theater program is one of the best in the country. You're calling it a back up," Carly rudely scoffs. That girl has an attitude problem.  
>"I'm one of the best of the best. Screw the best in the country. How about the best theater programs in the world? There are a couple schools in London I would love to attend. I've been contemplating Julliard. All because certain people are willing to settle doesn't mean I have to. Carly dear, you must only wish you'd get in. I know I will." The class gasps at my blunt behavior. This is the Sam they recognize. This time around I fighting with words and not my fists.<br>"I contacted Sam yesterday to prepare a performance for you all. I asked her to pick something of meaning and explain the song choice to you all before she sings."  
>I nod and speak, "a long time ago I fell for someone I shouldn't have. The feelings I felt should have been forbidden. He was completely off limits but I fell for him anyway. After a while, I felt he was messing with my head. He brought me out of a dark place, but he confused me so often. He claimed to have wanted me as much as I wanted him, but was with someone else. I guess this song is about being able to stand on your own and not putting up with a guy's manipulation." I look Fredward Benson in the eye, "this is Turning Tables by Adele." I began to play piano and sing.<p>

_"Close enough to start a war_  
><em>All that I have is on the floor<em>  
><em>God only knows what we're fighting for<em>  
><em>All that I say, you always say more<em>  
><em>I can't keep up with your turning tables<em>  
><em>Under your thumb I can't breathe"<em>

I live for this moment. My eyes are closed as I bear my soul. The room is ghostly quiet as I hit every note with perfection. This song reminds me of him so much. We are always at each other's throats. Every argument and fight was a battle in our never ending war. Then things changed. We were also closer than people assumed but we got too close.

_"So, I won't let you close enough to hurt me_  
><em>No, I won't rescue you to just desert me<em>  
><em>I can't give you the heart you think you gave me<em>  
><em>It's time to say goodbye to turning tables<em>  
><em>To turning tables"<em>

Carly was what kept us together in the eyes of other people. We could never get along without her according to them. They clearly knew nothing. There was a Sam and Freddie long before there was a Carly, Sam, and Freddie. He might not know it but he hurt me. He was my first kiss and it meant nothing to him. We went back to normal. I truly didn't I hid what I felt for him. It was just a crush. My heart was being torn each time he'd continue to chase after Carly.

_"Under haunted skies I see you_  
><em>Where love is lost your ghost is found<em>  
><em>I braved a hundred storms to leave you<em>  
><em>As hard as you try, no, I will never be knocked down, whoa"<em>

I lied to myself and claimed the sudden attraction was only because those feelings were always there. They were just hidden below the surface. People never understood our relationship. I was torn when Carly agreed to go out with Freddie. He even tried to kiss me, when they were dating. He told me he liked me when he was with her. At that party last summer, people judged me and refused to listen to my side of the story. I was just the whore who couldn't keep her hands off her best friend's man. I refused to let them bother me so I left. It wan't like I had any reason to stay.

_"I can't keep up with your turning tables_  
><em>Under your thumb I can't breathe<em>  
><em>So, I won't let you close enough to hurt me,<em>  
><em>No, I won't rescue you to just desert me<em>  
><em>I can't give you the heart you think you gave me<em>  
><em>It's time to say goodbye to turning tables<em>  
><em>Turning tables"<em>

One moment we were trying to kill one another. The next we're comforting each other in times of need. We used to hang out and have fun. What others saw was just as how. He screwed everything up. We shouldn't have been spending so much time together. He should have shut me out. He had a girlfriend. He didn't need me. On his father's birthday, he let me in. It should have been Carly! He was grinding on me , while dating her. I deserve better than that manipulation. He just wanted the best of both worlds.

_"Next time I'll be braver_  
><em>I'll be my own savior<em>  
><em>When the thunder calls for me<em>  
><em>Next time I'll be braver<em>  
><em>I'll be my own savior<em>  
><em>Standing on my own two feet"<em>

My love life is practically non-existent now. I like it that way. Who needs love? High schoolers aren't mature enough to handle it. I have dreams to chase and adventures to face. Love can't getting the way. The next time I'm willing to open my heart I won't rely on the person the way I did the dork. He pulled me out from my depressing home situation. My mother is still as toxic as ever. I can handle it on my own. I don;t need anyone to make me happy.

_"I won't let you close enough to hurt me,_  
><em>No, I won't rescue you to just desert me<em>  
><em>I can't give you the heart you think you gave me<em>  
><em>It's time to say goodbye to turning tables<em>  
><em>To turning tables<em>  
><em>Turning tables, yeah<em>  
><em>Turning, oh"<em>

I finish the song and look at my classmates. Jaws are almost literally on the floor. That was nothing. I hear the applause of Ms. Darbus. I'm guessing she approves. I walk back to my seat and I'm met with the stares of Tasha and Wendy. Ms. Darbus compliments me on my portrayal of real emotion and speaks more about the class in the upcoming months. "What?" I ask my friends.  
>"You didn't tell us you could sing like that," Tasha hisses at me.<br>"You knew I studied it at school. I've told you about my awards."  
>"We didn't think it was anything major. We knew about acting. Lying is almost your second nature. But music... We thought it would be average at best," Wendy tells me.<br>"No one has a chance against you for a lead role."  
>"Don't worry there are two leading ladies," I comment before ignoring the speech Ms. Darbus was making. My eyes reconnect to the brown orbs of a certain tech geek. He was almost pleading with me to know the meaning of the song. Was it about him? Did I find someone else? There was never anyone else. Dates were always meaningless. Moments like this convince me I am destined to be alone. I haven't truly moved on to another guy. This nub is still in my heart. I'm guessing by the way my heart skips a beat when I look at him, he always will be. I don't want to complicate things. I just pray this feeling goes away.<p>

AN: Actual Seddie interaction in the next chapter. After a long wait, it is finally here. I've been waiting for this moment. Why does Ms. Darbus sound so familiar. Ideas? Praise? Criticism (Constructive)? Review for more!


	2. First Encounter

I Want To Love You (P.Y.T.)  
>Pretty Young Thing<br>You Need Some Lovin' (T.L.C.)  
>Tender Lovin' Care<br>And I'll Take You There  
>I Want To Love You (P.Y.T.)<br>Pretty Young Thing  
>You Need Some Lovin' (T.L.C.)<br>Tender Lovin' Care  
>I'll Take You There<br>Michael Jackson - P.Y.T. (Pretty Young Thing)

Freddie POV:

Sometimes I just want to hate her. She's rude and obnoxious and insensitive to my feelings. She was all those things, but now I don't know who she is. She was polite and respectful to Ms. Darbus. People change might be an understatement. Sam didn't even threaten Carly after their bitter exchange. Sam would never hit Carly in the past, but they aren't on good terms now. Sam has never had so much self control. What the hell happened?

I'm not the same nerd I used to be. Freddie Benson is a bad boy. Not really. I just like to party and make out with random hot girls. I don't go much further than making out. I am proudly not a man whore. My virgin status remains hidden from the population of Ridgeway High School. Speaking of hot girls, there was never an explanation as to why she isn't still at her boarding school. Did she get kicked out? That's classic Sam. Trouble was her middle name. Then again that is past tense. Who knew Sam would do musical theater?

She's a natural performer, but musicals. The glitz and glamour and drama are so different from the Sam I once knew. She's not that girl anymore. Her voice is more beautiful than I remembered it to be. Was the song for me? Or someone else? Who else has earned Sam's love? Then again did she ever love me at all? She might have. Sam doesn't deal with emotions so why would she lie and tell me she did. Why couldn't she have said it to my face? I know it's easier to do things in writing. Breaking up with someone over text is cruel but hurts less for the person doing the dumping. They could care less about the pain the person who is being dumped felt.

After Sam left, iCarly went on for another year. We made up an excuse about Sam being in juvie so she wouldn't be there. We honestly had no idea where Sam left to. I knew it was useless to contact Sam's mom for information. She's such a drunk and is never around any way. I went to her house a few days after receiving the letter. Pam Puckett left for Cancun, Mexico. There was an eviction notice on the door. Sam was replaced with Gibby of all people. He was funny but he couldn't fill the void. The show was missing the humor of Sam and our bickering that dominated. We began to lose viewers. Nevel published a negative review of our show and people stopped watching. It's sad to say the review was brutally honest. He said the show had all the elements of what should be a good comedy, but iCarly was empty. Carly might have been the "star" but Sam is the heart of the show.

At this very moment I am sitting next to Samantha Puckett. It wasn't by choice. He's the only teacher who assigns seats. We're not in second grade. When she walked by a group of guys, they whistled at her. I unknowingly clenched my fingers into a fist. Sam shot them a glare that would kill. The boys instantly turned away out of fear Didn't they hear what happened to their friend this morning. I can't necessarily blame them seeing how she has filled out especially in the chest region. I'm angry as fuck with her yet I'm drawn to her. Mr. Connick is rambling about some huge project that no one cares about. "This project will be done by the end of the first semester in the winter. It will focus upon on a subject you will pick with a partner. Your partner will be the person sitting to your left. I want your topics by tomorrow." I look over and see blonde curls and sigh. Shane is working with Tasha. Jonah is working with Wendy and I'm stock with a blonde headed demon. Thank God this is the last period of the day. The bell rings and everyone rushes out the classroom. I slowly gather myself together.

I walk to my locker and see the beautiful devil waiting for me. I can tell by her facial expression that she is thinking of a way to greet me. "Benson," she settles upon.  
>"Puckett." I am unsure of where this conversation is heading.<br>"Sooo..." Her voice drifts off and something inside me snaps.  
>"Why are you here?" I glare into her blue gray eyes. God her looks can make my knees weak. I need to be strong at least for now.<br>"When did you get so rude?" she questions me. I should be asking the questions. You can't just disappear for two years and not think people would want answers.  
>"Answer the question." How long is she going to avoid this?<br>"Someone is demanding. I'm trying to talk to you about the project."  
>"I'm trying to figure out what you are doing here in Seattle and not London."<br>"My school shut down." That's not a specific answer. Why is she being so vague? What is she avoiding?  
>"Why did you leave in the first place?" This is what I've been dying to ask.<br>"This is a conversation for another time."  
>"I want answers now. It's been two years. You're such a coward. What are you running from? Is it me?"<br>"Not everything is about you, nub." I haven't heard that in a while. What is a nub anyway?  
>"Then explain it to me. You can't just say what you said and leave."<br>"Why not? You said and then assaulted me with your lips. After that, I'm verbally abused and your ass is vomiting drunkenly. Way to defend me. Go Fredloser!" She's just as sarcastic as before. Is it weird that Angry Sam is turning me on? I kinda want her to try to wrestle me like in the old days. The thought of her straddling me in that skirt is pleasurable. Why is she wearing a skirt? It's almost girly but it's bad ass. My eyes wander over her outfit as she was speaking. The word sexy doesn't do her body justice. My eyes stop on her low cut tank top under her leather jacket. It doesn't show enough cleavage to satisfy the boys of Ridgeway. I'm not a pervert. When she stops speaking I look her in the eye. I hope she didn't notice me checking her out jut now. I know she just insulted me so I have to defend myself. I've grown a backbone of sorts.  
>"You can't blame me-" She interrupts me in her usual rude manner.<br>"Yes I can. I'm coming over to your place to pick a subject tonight. See ya later, dork."  
>She stormed off before I could tell her she wasn't invited over. I don't want her in my home. My mom has the night shift luckily. That could be a good or a bad thing. Sam won't break any bones if my mom is home. I don't want my Mom to stop us from making progress by interrupting every five seconds. I would have recommended the Groovy Smoothie but it's not best to be out in public alone with her. People would assume things like it's a date. I definitely don't want to date a witch like that. I just find her attractive.<p>

"Hey Freddie." The voice belonging to my ex-girlfriend and former best friend. The halls are empty. Most students left to take the bus home.  
>"Carly. What do you want?"<br>"There's no need to be hostile. I just wanted to no what you and Sam were talking about."  
>"Aren't you curious? It's really none of your business."<br>"You seem to be in an angry mood. Did I do something wrong?"  
>"I'm sorry I haven't forgiven you for trying to start a rumor about me."<br>"That was almost a year ago. Why can't you get over it?"  
>"You never actually apologized. I'm glad no one actually believed you."<br>"It was a mistake, Freddie."  
>"You told everyone I was a hermaphrodite." Carly at that time was a known liar. She cheated on all three of her boyfriends after me. Now she just sleeps around. No one wants an actual relationship with a skank.<br>"It slipped out accidentally!" She can never just take responsibility for her actions.  
>"I don't see how." Why would I believe her pathetic excuse?<br>"I was just angry." Angry for a stupid reason. She needs to get over herself.  
>"It was all because I refused to start a new web show with you and your pink posse."<br>"You shouldn't have turned down the offer. I would have given you anything."  
>"I'm sorry I didn't allow you to seduce me. I don't know who else has been up your pussy or what diseases you might have contracted. I rejected you and then you started a rumor. Why do you think we're friends?"<br>"I just think we could help each other out with the Sam situation." What does she have planned for Sam? I want nothing to do with it.  
>"Sam's here and I could care less. I don't need any help from you. Why don't you run along and open your legs for another guy?" This obviously pissed her off and I just walked away. I hate dealing with her. In a few hours, Sam will be at my apartment. I really hope Carly doesn't see. I don't need her telling people I'm sleeping with Sam or something stupid like that. What ever happened to my best friends? A little thing called love ruined it all.<p>

AN: Chapter 2! Aren't you excited for what's next? I'm going to study so me more for SATs and then cry a bit. Failure of a Father will be finished by the end of next week. Praise? Comments? Ideas? Review! Do you want more?


	3. Starting A Project

You know I'm just a fool who's willing  
>To sit around and wait for you<br>But, baby, can't you see  
>There's nothing else for me to do?<br>I'm hopelessly devoted to you  
>Olivia Newton John - Hopelessly Devoted to You<p>

Sam POV:

Is it weird that I'm more attracted to him now than I was before? What has changed about that little nerd? He has the same chocolate brown eyes and conceited smirk when answering a teacher's question. Maybe its just the biceps he's gained obviously from hitting the gym. Why does the dork need to work out? Who is he trying to impress? I would say perfect little Carly. I know they aren't on the best terms. The last episode of iCarly was actually a disaster. Spencer made an ice sculpture of the airhead that somehow caught fire. Carly kept on saying something about her fame never going to end and how being a star is a lot of work. Then she claimed that she did all the work while others did nothing at all. Freddie was clearly offended and she said something along the lines of "any monkey can hold a camera. You just happen to be the best monkey to do it." She clearly did not want the show to end, while Freddie was clearly done with it. Gibby could have cared less as he was helping Spencer get rid of the fire.

Is it weird that I can't seem to stay away from him? Being involved in Musical Theater will take a lot of after school hours. Now we're partners for our Media Studies class. We have to film something and show emotion of some sort. It wasn't really specific. I honestly like the vagueness. It gives me room to be creative. Freddie isn't the most creative person, but he can take direction. I like giving orders and I know he'll follow them. He's a submissive person. That will never change. He might grow a back bone,but he'll still listen to my demands. I stand in the middle of the hallway in between the apartments of the Shay and Benson families. I decide to be polite and knock at Freddork's door. I'm a bit tired and too lazy to pick the lock. "Coming!" I hear a response. I recognize the voice as Freddie's. The door opens suddenly. "Sam?" His voice shows his obvious confusion.

"Yes."  
>"You're on time." Way to state the obvious.<br>"I see that."  
>"You're never on time." Thanks for the faith Freddie. Nice to know that you don't think people can change for the better.<br>"That is a false statement for this situation is evidence to the contrary."  
>"You knocked." What is with him? It's kinda cute. Oh Lord, what is happening to me?<br>"Are you going to invite me in?"  
>"Come in." The loser steps to the side. I see his apartment never changed. It's just as neat and tidy as before.<br>"I assume your mother is working."  
>"You assumed correctly. I can't take it anymore. What is with you?"<br>"Shouldn't I be asking you that question?" He continues on as if he was ignoring my response.  
>"You were being polite to teachers. You talked with what appears to be sophistication. You're using manners."<br>"I don't understand. Do you want me to be mean?" He managed to confuse me greatly. Go Benson!  
>"Why does it care what I want? Where's the aggression?"<br>"Aggressive Sam had anger issues that she sought treatment for. I channel my energy into expressing myself via performing as well as my education."  
>"Education?"<br>"Yes. I am referring to my school work." I'm not stupid. I wonder if he realizes how rude he is being.  
>"You do school work?" Now he's just being offensive.<br>"Can you stop undermining my intelligence. I'm a B student now. I have goals and ambitions. People change. Get over it."  
>"Can I ask what are these goals and ambitions?" How is that any of his business?<br>"I don't know. Can you?" I joke with him.  
>"Just tell me," he commands stubbornly.<br>"I remember, when you used to be a gentleman."  
>"Please..." He tries to get me to spill. I easily give into those pleading brown eyes that still make me melt. I hate him.<br>"I told you in class about studying drama and theater."  
>"What schools beside WSU?" he asked as his head tilt showed his curiosity.<br>"Well there's Julliard, NYU, Brown University, UCLA and London Academy of Music and Dramatic Arts."  
>"That's pretty far," he comments.<br>"How about you?" I ask in an attempt to be civil.  
>"I want to go to film school. I've got a lot of experience with cameras, you know. I was thinking Columbia, NYU, University of Southern California, London Film School, or National Film and Television School." He even plans to apply to an ivy league school. He's smart enough to make it. He's the smarter person I know including those snobby boys from the school across from<br>"We both have picked some pretty prestigious schools. Two of those schools are in the UK. Why so far?" I'm curious. What or Whom could he be running from?  
>"I just fed up with my mother. Aren't you ambitious with your selection of schools?"<br>"When you're the best, you can afford to be ambitious."  
>"The best? That's sounds a bit arrogant."<br>"It's an accurate statement. They don't cast me lead for nothing. You have to be confident in the entertainment industry. It's the only way to survive the sea of sharks."  
>"Oh right."<br>"Are we going to get started?" I decide to switch the subject to the reason I came  
>"Um, yeah. I guess." He seemed hesitant to start for some reason.<br>"Any ideas?" Even though they're probably stupid.  
>"Sci-Fi film productions." Why is he such a nerd? How am I attracted to a dork? What the hell?<br>"Did you honestly think I might agree to that?" I am no loser or dork or nerd.  
>"No. What are you thinking? Broadway musicals." Is that supposed to be an insult?<br>"Musicals are my life. You wouldn't understand. We can do it on something else."  
>"Like what?"<br>"Greek mythology." I have a soft spot for reading about Gods and Goddesses duke it out.  
>"Nope." Is this just because his idea sucks?<br>"Why not?"  
>"The same reason you didn't agree with me. I'm not interested in it."<br>"Soundtrack to Shakespeare," I blurt out after thinking for a while.  
>"What?"<br>"Soundtrack to Shakespeare. We assign songs to different scenes in one of his plays. We can act out certain scenes with music in the background." We both love music. It's a common ground of sorts.  
>"That's not a bad idea." Did he expect me to give a bad idea? I love his confidence in me.<br>"It did come from me. I don't have bad ideas. What play?"  
>"Romeo and Juliet?" Way to pick the most obvious play. It may be a classic but it is way overdone. We're not doing Hamlet.<br>"That's cliché."  
>"I'd like to see you do any better." He sends a smirk my direction. He unintentionally manages to make my heart flutter. This is so sickening.<br>"What about MacBeth?" I like the darkness.  
>"If I wanted to listen to music that matched Macbeth, I would listen to songs from the Lion King." I wouldn't be shocked, if he still watches all those films regularly.<br>"A Midsummer Night's Dream," I suggest.  
>"That's a romantic comedy." Tell me something I don't know.<br>"So?"  
>"I thought Sam Puckett doesn't do romance." I though we went ever things changing earlier.<br>"There's nothing wrong with a little romance in life." He blushes. Why? I don't know.  
>"What made you think of Shakespeare?" he asks me.<br>"Well I just finished reading The Taming of the Shrew," I answer honestly.  
>"Why? I never pegged you as one to enjoy reading." He did bet me to read a book once. I won as usual.<br>"I'm an actress. I have to read scripts all the time. I use Shakespeare to brush up on my skills."  
>"Why did you leave?" The words slipped from his lips before he could stop them.<br>"Random." I was enjoying our civilized conversation.  
>"I know it would have been difficult here if you stayed after the party. That's no reason to leave and abandon me." The hurt expression on his face killed me.<br>"It was a great opportunity. I have a future now. I didn't know what I wanted to do before. I like this. I apply myself now. I'm not aggressive. I'm still me. I'm just more calm. I don't regret leaving."  
>"Did I have anything to do with you choosing to leave?" I'm not ready for this.<br>"That question is for another time."I get up and move towards the door with that statement.  
>"Sam!" I turn to face him. His eyes are pleading with me. I can't give in to him.<br>"I'll answer you. I can't right now."  
>"Can't or won't?" I detect the anger and frustration in his voice.<br>"It doesn't make a difference."  
>"I guess not," he agrees with me.<br>"This was nice. See ya later, Frednerd." I smile at him.  
>"Bye Sam." He returns the smile.<p>

This boy will be the death of me. I exit his apartment and stare across the hall at the Shay's apartment. I have this strange feeling of being watched. To be honest,I had that feeling the entire time I was there. Was someone creeping on us? Was someone creeping on me? I swear if Carly the prissy princess was watching me, I'd make sure she would never have the opportunity to do that again. She won't have the eyeballs to. Freddie and I got along for a while. That's a good sign. I girl can hope for the best to come. Knowing my life, it's unlikely.

AN: No Carly this chapter. I hate her so I don't care (just kidding). Do you think Sam is being paranoid? Was anyone actually watching them? Was it Carly? Was it all in Sam's imagination? How do you feel about their project? Ideas? Praise? Review!


	4. Auditions

Buddy you're a boy make a big noise  
>Playin' in the street gonna be a big man some day<br>You got mud on yo' face  
>You big disgrace<br>Kickin' your can all over the place  
>Singin'<br>We will we will rock you  
>We will we will rock you<br>Queen - We Will Rock You

Freddie POV:

It's been a week since Sam was at my apartment. We talk every now and again about the project. Sometimes her well mannered behavior makes her seem like a stranger. Then when lunch comes around she is the Sam girl I used to call my best friend. She was more than that to me. She was the girl that I loved. I almost feel like using past tense would be inaccurate. Do I still have feelings for her? It's a great possibility considering how I can't take my eyes off of her when she's in a room. The way light reflect off her golden locks is so distracting. Paying attention to the teacher can become a struggle with such a beauty in the class. It angers me knowing that I'm not the only one who stares. From the corner of my eye I can see many members of the male population drooling over her. I swear a guy who sits behind me in our Media Studies class was moaning her name when he was sleeping. Thank God I was the only one to hear him. I don't want to imagine the dirty thoughts he was thinking. I miss the days where cooties made life less complicated.

Ms. Darbus is having the members of our class who would like to participate in the production of the musical audition in front of everyone. "Hey," I hear a voice say from behind me. I see Sam sitting next to me in the auditorium. Tasha and Wendy are sitting beside her. Those two have already auditioned.  
>"Hey yourself," I great her with a smirk.<br>"My audition is next." Sam directed her eyes to Carly who was on stage singing her interpretation of Roar by Katy Perry with little passion. She's hitting the notes, but the lack of emotion behind it is obvious.  
>"What are you singing?" I'm genuinely curious to her song choice. Has her taste in music changed recently?<br>"Just wait and see. Picking an audition song can be difficult." That doesn't answer my question.  
>"In what way?"<br>"I like to force an emotional response from my performance. I decided to go for a song from one of my favorite musicals. Maybe you have seen the movie. The energy I put in has to do with my connection to the song. I would sing a song from one my favorite album but it's not appropriate in this setting. Guess which album?"  
>"Rumors by Fleetwood Mac," I answer. She used to play songs from there all the time.<br>"You are correct, Sir." She laughed as Carly's audition ended. Carly wasn't bad. She was obviously talented enough. Would she be able to get into character for one of the lead roles.  
>"So... Roxie or Velma?" Both roles are of great importance. Which one is she auditioning for?<br>"Velma." She smiles at me shyly. I wonder if she's nervous.  
>"Samantha Puckett," Ms. Darbus calls her to stage.<br>"That's me," Sam says as she stands to leave.  
>"Good Luck," I tell her.<br>Her body turns in my direction before she speaks,"the correct saying in this situation would be 'break a leg,' but thatnks anyway." I can see she dressed up for the occasion. It's just an audition for some lousy school musical. Then again, they do say that the clothes make the man (woman in this instance). She's wearing a plain navy blue a-line dress. "Hi, I'm Sam Puckett and I will be performing On my own from the musical, _Les Misérables_"

_"On my own_  
><em>Pretending he's beside me<em>  
><em>All alone<em>  
><em>I walk with him 'til morning<em>  
><em>Without him<em>  
><em>I feel his arms around me<em>  
><em>And when I lose my way, I close my eyes<em>  
><em>And he has found me."<em>

Her voice is soft yet emotional. It sounds as if she's sobbing. I can almost feel her heart beating as she sings for her love. It feels so real. It's almost as if her heart was ripped out of her chest. Maybe she has felt that pain before. For who?

_"In the rain_  
><em>The pavement shines like silver<em>  
><em>All the lights are misty in the river<em>  
><em>In the darkness<em>  
><em>The trees are full of starlight<em>  
><em>And all I see is him and me for ever and forever"<em>

Did she feel that pain two years ago? How mush did it hurt her when I was with Carly? Did it hurt her at all? I knew the jealous feeling I got when either Carly or Sam had a new boyfriend They were my best friends. No one was supposed to steal my them from me. She told me she was in love with me in a letter. How long did she love me? Did I cause her pain?

_"And I know_  
><em>It's only in my mind<em>  
><em>That I'm talking to myself<em>  
><em>And not to him<em>  
><em>And although I know that he is blind<em>  
><em>Still I say<em>  
><em>There's a way for us"<em>

In a way, I can completely relate to the song. Unrequited love is practically my life story. I had the biggest crush on Sam and I knew her rejection would destroy. I kept my infatuation for her a secret. I decide that it was unhealthy and forced myself to like someone else. I developed a slightly obsessive crush on Carly. She turned me down quite often. I didn't car because it didn't hurt. The idea of not being wanted hurt. When Sam admitted her feelings for me unintentionally, I was over joyed.

_"I love him_  
><em>But when the night is over he is gone<em>  
><em>The river's just a river<em>  
><em>Without him<em>  
><em>The world around me changes<em>  
><em>The trees are bare and everywhere <em>  
><em>The streets are full of strangers"<em>

I felt broken, after she left. Half of my heart was torn away. I drunkenly told her that I was in love with her. I doubt she believed me. I was being honest. Most people either most honest or delusional, when drinking. Being without her, the world seemed darker. She always used to brighten my day. I lost my best friends all from the events of one summer.

_"I love him_  
><em>But every day I'm learning<em>  
><em>All my life<em>  
><em>I've only been pretending<em>  
><em>Without me<em>  
><em>His world will go on turning<em>  
><em>A world that's full of happiness<em>  
><em>That I have never known"<em>

_T_he dynamic of the characters of Les Misérables mirrors who we were that Summer. We were a trio including two girls and one boy. Éponine longed to be with Marius who was in a relationship with Cosette. I was with Carly, when my heart belonged to Sam. The difference between us is Marius truly loved Cosette. I was only with Carly, because I was a coward. I was afraid of my feelings for Sam. Am I till afraid? Do those feelings still exists?

_"I love him_  
><em>I love him<em>  
><em>And I love him<em>  
><em>But only on my own"<em>

Sam's voice demonstrated control, power, and passion. The emotion was overwhelming. Tears glistened in her eyes from the performance. Her voice made her appear even more beautiful for before (if possible). She can never cease to amaze me. Ms, Darbus actually gave her a standing ovations. She cried out, "Brava, Brava."  
>"Thank you," Sam said before she left the stage. Wendy and Tasha grabbed her and pulled her to her seat next to me.<br>"You were incredible," Wendy gave her a compliment.  
>"It could have been better," Sam said modestly.<br>"What are you talking about? You are guaranteed to be one of the leads!" Tasha shouted. She was hushed by our classmates. The looks on their faces showed they agreed with her statement though.  
>"You guys will get parts too."<br>"Not the lead," Tasha and Wendy spoke in unison. It's almost creepy how connected those two are.  
>"Who do you think will get the other lead?" I ask them.<br>"Obviously me," Carly interjected. II looked and saw her siting closely behind Sam. "You better watch your back, Puckett."  
>"If we are both leads, why are you harassing me?" Sam questioned with curiosity.<br>"There can only be one star. That would be me," Carly answered her former best friend.  
>"I beg to differ. Sam's way better than you are." Wendy jumped to Sam's defense. Tasha nodded to show Wendy support.<br>"Stay out of this," Carly hissed. "It's none of your business."  
>"You are wrong again. The musical affect all of us. If you chose not to work as a team player, you'll ruin the show. I suggest you shut up and keep your dimwitted opinions to yourself," Sam spoke with a glare that said death. This effectively shut Carly up.<br>"You should watch your back," I tell Sam.  
>"Why is that?" Sam's eyes lit up.<br>"You're obviously better than her. She'll do anything to get rid of you."  
>"I can handle myself." She smiled at me showing she enjoyed knowing that I cared. Of course, I care. She almost looked shocked.<br>"I know you can. Just be cautious." I respond.  
>"I will."<p>

With a talent like Sam, this musical will surely be the greatest ever. I like that we are civil, but I hate that we don't speak enough. I want more from her. I want more Sam. She still hasn't answered my question. She says I have to be patient, but we all know how I can be anxious. I need to know the answer. Did I prompt Sam to leave? What did I do wrong? I know I screwed up by chasing Carly. She ruined Everything! Carly was once a sweet girl with great ambition. No she's just a conniving witch who lives for attention. What is she planning? I know she has something in the works. We just have to wait and see.

AN: I'm with Sam. Picking an audition song is a struggle. It's not an easy process. How did you like the song? I refuse to put Carly's audition song lyrics. No one was really listening anyway. I saw Chicago on Broadway last year so I'll use my knowledge from that experience for this story. Praise? Constructive Criticism? Song ideas? Review!


	5. Rivals

I keep going to the river to pray  
>'Cause I need something that can wash all the pain<br>And at most I'm sleeping all these demons away  
>But your ghost, the ghost of you<br>It keeps me awake  
>Ella Henderson - Ghost<p>

Sam POV:

It's the end of the day. I walk to my locker and see Freddie waiting for me. "Congrats. I heard you got the role you wanted," the dork said.  
>"Thanks," I say politely. His brown eyes look so warm.<br>"Too bad you have to work with Carly." I really don't want to talk about her. Why is he bringing her up? He used to have an undying love for her. I'm glad that's over.  
>"We both used to work with her a long time ago." Doing iCarly used to be fun. I used to be satisfied as the sidekick. I capable of more than that.<br>"It's been years," he stated. Didn't they do the show with Gibby? People weren't the biggest fans of him. Think about it: me or Gibby.  
>"Actually you two stopped iCarly about a year ago." Gibby and liquid soap do not make a good show.<br>"I rather not talk about that." I can see why. It really sucked, after a while.  
>"Bad memories?" I wonder what went on behind the scenes. Carly and Freddie are exes. Was there tension? Hopefully not of the sexual kind.<br>"Yeah." Spencer might have set his equipment on fire or something. I have to visit that big goof.  
>"I know what you mean." Rich kids have drama too. They just spend all their parents money, sleep around, drink and might do drugs. Not all of them are bad. I just hate the majority.<br>"Are you excited for the musical?" He should know the answer to that question.  
>"Of course. This is what I live for." I'm multi-talented. Performing is my nature.<br>"I never thought I'd see you so excited for something school related." Oh not this again. I just want to slap him. I can't hurt his cute face. I've come to accept the fact that I'm attracted to him.  
>"You know I've changed." I've been friendly and polite to people unless they deserve otherwise.<br>"You're less violent." I haven't abused him yet. Is he looking at my chest?  
>"Yes I am." He's definitely looking down my shirt. When did he get so tall? Maybe I should start wearing heels. On a second thought, I rather not trip and fall.<br>"I'm still adjusting to it all." Can he at least pretend to be looking me in the eye?Hormonal teen boys will face my wrath.  
>"You're helping Ms. Darbus correct, right?" Maybe I can distract him from m chest.<br>"Yeah why?" He's looking me in the eye. Mission: accomplished.  
>"I just wanted to know what we were doing about choreography." My pageant career of dancing makes me equipped to dominate the stage.<br>"Huh?" He can be such a clueless boy. Ms. Darbus would be a better option to discuss this with. She's not here. Is she? I think not.  
>"The dance routines are pretty intense in Chicago." I know I can handle it.<br>"Yes?" Freddie can dance well. I remember dancing with him in that night club. His body was pressed against mine. Then we danced in the rain. I realized then I was in love with him.  
>"Do you think Carly can handle them?" The girl is OK. She doesn't have two left feet but she's not nearly as good as me.<br>"What do you mean?" Get a clue. For a smart person he can be so stupid. He raised his eyebrow in the hottest way.  
>"There is this one dance number I absolutely adore. As Roxie, Carly has to perform it perfectly." We Both Reached for the Gun is probably my favorite dance number.<br>"Perfection is impossible." Who does this nerd think he is?  
>"This is coming from the nerd who freaks out over a 99 on a test."<br>"That 1% means everything." Does he realize that he sounds like a bigger geek than normal? He jeans look good on him though.  
>"Shut up." His shoulders are broad and his chest fills out his shirt well.<br>"Yes ma'am." If I was a pathetic girl, I would drool at the sight of his smirk.  
>"We can't afford to have Carly's lack of dance skills ruin the musical." Carly sucks (the male population all know about what she sucks at quite often) and I rock.<br>"All you have to do is hop around and look sexy. What could go wrong?" Hop?  
>"Sexy? It's a bit risqué. It's more than hopping around. I've got rhythm. Cell Block Tango and All that Jazz are going to be the two best performances of the night." It takes skill.<br>"You're confident." His smile could replace the sun. Look at me being poetic.  
>"Obviously." I start to play with my hair.<br>"We have rehearsal after school." I know. I'm the lead, remember.  
>"I'll just have Ms. Darbus go over the dance number." She loves me. Who wouldn't?<br>"Have you been avoiding me?" Yes. You don't need to know that.  
>"No." His pout is adorable. I can't handle this.<br>"You seem to be keeping your distance." I wonder if he has this affect on other girls.  
>"I'm just busy." I'm losing my mind. I want to reach out and teach him.<br>"Doing what?" What is wrong with me? I can't think straight.  
>"Narrowing down my college list. Setting up auditions. Practicing." It's way too much work, but I gotta do it.<br>"Practicing?" I'm naturally gifted. I personally don't believe I need it.  
>"Singing and playing instruments." Music has always been my passion.<br>"Really?" Why does he sound so surprised?  
>"You knew, I could play." He saw my performance on the first day.<br>"I knew you could play piano." Turning tables was for him.  
>"That and guitar. I play a bit of ukulele." I know he's amazed.<br>"Interesting." Don't try to hide how impressed you are.  
>"Yep," I reply.<br>"We should hang out." No! No! No! Danger! Danger! Danger!  
>"Why?" Mission abort.<br>"You don't want to hang out?" He frowned. I can't resist. I have to try.  
>"It's not that." I like spending time with him. I just don't want to.<br>"Then what?" His eyes are pleading with me.  
>"I know what you're going to ask." He needs to stop pushing me before I explode.<br>"Stop avoiding this. You can't forever." Does he think I'm stupid?  
>"I know." I'm just delaying the inevitable.<br>"Stop running. We used to be best friends." The past tense in that statement hurts.  
>"Are we even friends now?" Does he care about me still? God, I hope so.<br>"We'll always be friends in some way Sam." I doubt that's true.  
>"We used to say that about our relationship with Carly." Carly is always a problem.<br>"Look at her now." He rolled his eyes at me.  
>"She's changed for the worst." I miss the girl who used to be my best friend.<br>"You changed too." Is he comparing me to her?  
>"For the better?" I know I'm better than her.<br>"Maybe. Maybe not." He smiled slyly.  
>"Nub." I shoved his shoulder playfully. I know I didn't hurt him. He pretended to be injured and winced in pain.<br>"That's my Sam." What did he just say?  
>"Your Sam?" I am no one's property.<br>"You know what I mean." I wouldn't be asking, if I did.  
>"No, I don't." That's clear.<br>"Uhhhh." What is he avoiding?  
>"So... What do you mean by that?" Just get to the explanation.<br>"Well..." He's so frustrating at times.  
>"Answer the question. I hope you weren't insinuating that you owned me."<br>"I'd never do that." He waved his arms frantically.  
>"Then explain!" I demanded.<br>"Bossy," his lip was pouted as he spoke.  
>"Freddork!" He is getting on my nerves.<br>"Why the nicknames?" He's gonna make me use my fist.  
>"Moments like this make me forget about the training I had for more anger issues. I have no probably causing you pain."<br>"Please don't," he started to beg.  
>"Frednub!"<br>"Alright. I was just saying that you sounded like the girl I used to know who was my best friend. She was the first friend I made in Seattle. She was funny and mean and sweet somehow. She was the girl I..." his voice drifted off.  
>"You what?" I question.<br>"Nothing."  
>"Tell me." When did he get so difficult?<br>"No!"  
>"If it's nothing it shouldn't matter."<br>"She's the girl I care deeply for." Has his feelings changed?  
>"Was that so hard?" I smile at him.<br>"It's embarrassing." He returns the smile leaning towards me.  
>"How so?"<br>"Boys aren't usually emotional." That is noting to be ashamed of. It's kinda sweet.  
>"Well... You-" I began speaking.<br>"Don't say I barely qualify as a boy," the nerd interrupted me.  
>"I wasn't." I sent a smirk his direction.<br>"Then what were you going to say."  
>"You shouldn't he afraid of having feelings. You are a lovable virgin," I joke with him.<br>"There is nothing wrong with lacking experience sexually." He attempted to defend himself.  
>"I agree." There is nothing wrong with not sleeping around.<br>"I'll see you later."  
>"Bye Fredweeb." I swear I can hear a whisper saying <em>"The girl that I love."<em>

I turn and see my former best friend. "Sam."  
>"Carly," I greet her.<br>"I see that you got the role of Velma." Don't be jealous. She's a better character.  
>"You are Roxie." Roxie has nothing on Velma.<br>"I truly wanted Velma." Sucks to be you.  
>"We can't have everything we want. Can we?" I raise my eyebow at her.<br>"Rude." Did she come to irritate me?  
>"Why are you talking to me?" What is her purpose for being here?<br>"Stupid Puckett. I'm just here to remind you to stay out of my spotlight." What is her problem.  
>"Have you ever considered surgery?" I ask.<br>"Why?"  
>"Maybe they can perform a brain transplant because yours clearly isn't working." She's an idiot.<br>"Excuse me." Can she not comprehend what I said? Why you so stupid?  
>"I'm going to give the best performance I can in the musical, if you like it or not," I tell her.<br>"I don't want you to screw it up." She would be the one to ruin things.  
>"Give it up. We all know I'm better than you."<br>"That's not true. I'm the star." Attention Whore!  
>"You are the star in only your deluded mind." Being honest can hurt.<br>"I'm going to ruin your life here Puckett. You are such a whore." Virgins can't be whores.  
>"I can't believe that. We all know you are the queen of sluts and hoes."<br>"Bitch." What an amazing insult? Thanks.  
>"Staple those legs shut. No one knows what STDs you might carry."<br>"I am completely healthy." For how long?  
>"I heard you caught something from Jonah."<br>"Lies." I doubted she would admit it.  
>"Gonorrhea right? You've had it multiple times. You got it from different partners each time." I shook my head at her.<br>"It was only one time!" Ew. She's been infected.  
>"That doesn't really help your reputation."<br>"I'm going to make your life hell, Samantha."  
>"I'm going to knock you unconscious if you don't get out if my face." She turn and ran away. She should know better than to mess with me. What comes around goes around. Karma's a bitch.<p>

AN: I love Ghost by Ella Henderson. Sorry I haven't uploaded. I've been sick. I took the SATs of Saturday. I'll try to make it up to you. Ideas? Praise? Comments? REVIEW!


	6. Bonding

When there's no-one else in sight  
>In the crowded lonely night<br>Well I wait so long  
>For my love vibration<br>And I'm dancing with myself  
>Billy Idol - Dancing With Myself<p>

Freddie POV:  
>"This is pointless," Sam pouted. It was cute.<br>"We are bonding." Playing lovers for our media studies project requires chemistry.  
>"I don't see how sitting in your room watching Celebrities Underwater counts as bonding. By the way, how many girls have been in here other than your mother?" I can be a ladies man.<br>"Four."  
>"That's not a family member," she stated with a smirk.<br>"One," I mumbled.  
>"Just me." She smiled at me tauntingly.<br>"Just you."  
>"That was obvious. No other girl would come in here." Ouch. The ladies love me. I am top three hottest nerds in school. Shane and the new kid Brad are also hot nerds according to girls.<br>"I've hooked up with plenty of girls." Thinking about it now. There havent been that many. I can action if I want.  
>"You havent gotten further than 1st base." How would she know?<br>"You probably have secret slut habits." Sam's eyes lit with anger. Did I cross the line?  
>"Please, I'm pure. I haven't been corrupted," the blinde beauty snapped at me.<br>"You've been to juvie." Her criminal record is ridiculous.  
>"I'm a born again law abiding citizen." I wonder how long that is gonna last. Old habits die hard.<br>"That doesn't mean you haven't had your share of guys." I wonder how many. I'll track them down and choke them out.  
>"No, I haven't." She probably scared them off with her violence.<br>"You're right. What guy would want you?" Take that. I may not have many girl, but she isn't romantically (or sexually) experienced.  
>"Are you kidding me?" she asked. She didn't even sound offended. She actually started to laugh.<br>"What?"  
>"That insult is just weak. Are you saying I'm undesirable?" My insults are not weak I can do some damage.<br>"Maybe I am."  
>"Yes because the pervy teen boys creeping on me daily shows how unattractive I am. Who cares about locker 239 and the cheerleaders that walk right past it on their way to practice? Guys want the locker near me so they can discreetly check me out. If it was super obvious, i would poke an eye out. You in particular are lucky you can see at all." She does have a body that can make a gay man drool.<br>"Me?" I raised my eyebrow at her.  
>"Yes, you," she responded.<br>"What do I do?"  
>"You are way too obvious about it. My eyes are on my face not my chest." I'm a teenage boy. I have hormones. You can't judge me.<br>"I know that. I just struggle to get used to the way you developed physically and you were hot before." I remember her in that bikini two years ago. Her in a bikini now is gonna haunt my dreams.  
>"I'm glad you can admit I'm even hotter now." You are. Her ego is ridiculously huge at times. She needs to take a step back.<br>"You want me just as bad as I want you."  
>"What?" Confusion is evident on her face.<br>"Don't act like you don't know. I see the way you look at me." She remains confused. I can tell by the way her brows furrowed.  
>"All I see is your nubby nerdy puny self." Isn't she sweet?<br>"You know I'm not so puny anymore. You like the way I flex my biceps." I demonstrate to show off my muscle.  
>"I'm still stronger than you." We arm wrestled and this tiny girl won.<br>"You are just freakishly strong. You know you like my muscles. I've been working out," I reply.  
>"Why? Who do you have to impress? Your mother could care less about your abs." She sounds curious about my love life (or lack of).<br>"Nice to know you've thought about my abs. Is it me or do you sound jealous?" I taunt her with a smirk of my own.  
>"Why would I be?" Her voice sounds almost defensive.<br>"Did you mean what you wrote in the letter?" I blurt out. Why did I have to ask?  
>"What?" Don't act like you don't know.<br>"Did you mean it when you told me that you loved me?" I ask her.  
>"Why are you bringing this up?"<br>"I just want to know."  
>"You should already know the answer." She frowned at me hating the subject matter.<br>"The way you avoid me makes it difficult to know."  
>"I can't believe our teacher made us change our Media Studies project."<br>"Don't switch the topic." She's avoiding this again.  
>"He claims Midsummer night's dream isn't as well known. I could care less. He wanted a romance. Romeo and Juliet! I did't want to do it because it was so cliche. Now I have to kiss your nubby butt."<br>"You didn't have such a problem before," I tell her.  
>"I did considering you dumped your girlfriend who was my best friend at a party an hour the before. I was then humiliated as your drunk self vomited everywhere."<br>"I'm sorry," I apologized.  
>"I'm over it." I couldn't tell from the anger you just expressed.<br>"I have something to show you." I remembered what I had in my closet. I got off my bed that we were sitting on to retrieve it.  
>"What is it?" Her head tilts in interest.<br>"Wait." Patience is nonexistent for this Puckett.  
>"Hurry up." See how eager she is.<br>"I've got it." I pull the surprise from the closet.  
>"Is that a guitar?" You have eyes. You see what it is.<br>"Yes it is."  
>"Where did you get that?"<br>"I get it from the a storage shed my mother rents. It belonged to my dad." My father used to be a really sore subject.  
>"Oh. I didn't know he played."<br>"Neither did I. It doesn't hurt to talk about him anymore." I don't want her to pity me. She doesn't. She knows I don't want sympathy.  
>"Why is that?"<br>"I just numbed myself from the pain." I still miss him dearly though.  
>"You can't ignore how you feel. God only knows how much I tried." Ger fingers strum across the guitar strings.<br>"Play something."  
>"Any requests?" She closes her eyes as she plays.<br>"Play what you love." That doesn't narrow down her selection.  
>"That's easy."<br>"Did you mean it?"  
>"Did you?"<br>"Did you always feel that way? Did I hurt you?"  
>"I'm not sure when it happened. I realized it when you were with her. Yes, you did hurt me. I know it was unintentionally."<br>"Was it because I was with her?"  
>"Yeah. I knew I had a crush on you, after the first kiss incident. I didn't know it would grow. I tried to push it away. You could go your own way. If you wanted me to, I could have given you more then she ever did."<br>"What is with you and that song?"  
>"I am playing it."<br>"I know. I want to hear you sing it."

_"Loving you_  
><em>Isn't the right thing to do<em>  
><em>How can I ever change things that I feel?"<em>

She shouldn't have loved me, but she did. She had no reason to love me. She is so much better than. I have muscles now, but she is still out of my league. There isn't anyone more gorgeous. She's easily the most beautiful girl I've ever seen. Why would you want me? In some magical way, she fell for my nerdy tech talk. She's not the same girl who chose not to apply herself. Her intellectual brilliance is obvious. She's creative and musically gifted. She could do so much better, but she chose me. She shouldn't have. I was technically off limits. Her best friend, Carly, was my girlfriend. It was my stupid fault. I tried to deny my feelings for her and dug myself into a deeper whole.

_"If I could_  
><em>Baby I'd give you my world<em>  
><em>How can I<em>  
><em>When you won't take it from me?"<em>

How did I not see it before? I was wrong to force feelings for Carly that weren't genuine. I thought it was normal to like girly fragile girls. I was always drawn to Sam whether I liked it or not. She makes me smile and laugh like no other. I hate knowing things have changed between us. I close my eyes like she has and listen to her sing.

_"You can go your own way_  
><em>Go your own way<em>  
><em>You can call it another lonely day<em>  
><em>You can go your own way<em>  
><em>Go your own way"<em>

She was setting me free. She didn't think she was good enough for me. How is that possible? How can someone so incredible be so insecure? She knows me better than I know myself. I know she was secretly jealous of Carly. She knew she shouldn't have been. Carly just got all the attention from boys and was well-liked by teachers. They didn't appreciate her. I know I didn't make life easy. I constantly compared the two and I shouldn't have.

_"Tell me why_  
><em>Everything turned around<em>  
><em>Packing up<em>  
><em>Shacking up's all you wanna do<em>  
><em>If I could<em>  
><em>Baby I'd give you my world<em>  
><em>Open up<em>  
><em>Everything's waiting for you"<em>

She was always right there. Maybe I should have been honest with my feeling for her from the start. I didn't want to drive her away. I cared about her and didn't want to risk losing her. Maybe she would think I was weird. We were young. Some boys were still in the boys are icky.

_"You can go your own way_  
><em>Go your own way<em>  
><em>You can call it another lonely day<em>  
><em>You can go your own way<em>  
><em>Go your own way"<em>

"It was always you," I state.  
>"Huh?"<br>"I had the biggest crush on you from the moment we met. You had wild crazy hair and you wore a pink dress. it looked like you were rolling around in the grass. It made no sense. From that moment I was hooked. Carly came and I had to distract myself from obsessing over you. It was always you," I explain.  
>"I gotta head home."<br>"I'll see you later." I offer her a smile.  
>"Bye." She waved as she left. She always makes my head spin. I'm glad she's back. I'm not sure if I'm going to let her go again.<p>

AN: It's been a while. I've been super busy lately. Ideas? Praise? Comments? Questions?Review! No Reviews! No new chapter!


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